Do You Remember Your First Love???

Hello Folks,

How have you all been? Good I trust.

I've had a very busy summer, and I've not had much time for blogging. Trying to get back into it I went through my numerous post drafts tonight. I came across the post below, which for some reason I never published. I wrote it at a stubborn time in my life. Please note this post was written about eighteen to twenty-four months ago. I want to reassure you that I am firmly back on the market and very much optimistic about meeting someone new. But I've got to tell you, this post made me laugh. Especially the stories of my early loves. Lol! I've chosen not to edit a single word in it (including the title and the shout outs), so you get to read it exactly as you would have had I posted it at the time. 

I hope you enjoy this flashback!

"Hello People!!!

I feel like I've been away forever!!! Lol. But you've always been close to my thoughts. Promise.

How goes it? I trust you're all well. Shout out to Unveilinggold, Toinlicious and mstizzle! xxx

And a huge thank you to everyone that passes by this blog. Thanks for reading, visiting, following or just passing by. Much love to you!

So, on to this blog post. This post is soooo random. Please excuse the randomness. Just needed to put my thoughts down. 

So it's been over a year now since I got married (the divorce is eminent but still pending). Remember I said there would be the palava with his and my parents for us to perhaps hash things out? Well that never happened. In fact I've not heard from anyone in his family for a long time. The guy is such a liar, I wouldn't be surprised if he's told all sorts of lies about me to anyone who would listen. I remember I had to tell him to stop talking bad about his ex-wife to people when we first met, so I really wouldn't be surprised.

I feel somewhat disillusioned. Life is not what I thought it would be. My thirties are not (not so far anyways) as fun and exciting as I had at one point anticipated. I feel so let down by myself. I was speaking to some friends this evening and one of them told me they feel like they're always fighting with me to get me to come out. So it seems I've become some sort of recluse. As a general rule, I tend to only go out to celebrate the birthdays of my nearest and dearest and that is it. Hmmmph! When did this happen???

I remember when all I wanted to do was go out (I'm talking just a year ago). Now unless it's essential (i.e. someone will be offended at my not attending) I just don't go and I'm ok with that.

I've been asked, don't you want to meet someone new? Ummmm, NO! I'm ok. I've been let down enough by men. I wanna ride solo for now. Then I've got the friends who are seriously worried about me. A time when it seems so crucial for a woman to be on the market I've chosen to sit on the shelf and be content with it. What to do, what to do? My mother is sad and frustrated with me. But this is where I am for now.

In the mean while, I'm happy just hearing other people's dating stories, and I find myself getting excited for them. Someone I know is engaging in a brand new relationship. Oh remember when everything was brand new? The butterflies, the smile when your phone bleeps cos you know it's a text from him. Oh the days.

So I started to think about the very first time I had that feeling. His name was Yomi, I was 11/12 and he was 13/14. He was the tallest and most handsome boy in the church. Back then we had no phones except the house phone and I wouldn't dare give my house number to a boy. unless I was ready to be annihilated by my parents. Hahaha! We only saw each other on Sundays. So that was when I got my butterflies. On the way to church my stomach would be in knots. Every road bump the car went over made me feel sick to the stomach. When I'd see him the butterflies would go crazy. And when he noticed me and smiled at me I felt dizzy with excitement. Mehn! What ever happened to love's young dream??? When and how did it die?? (that's a rhetorical question - I know when and how.Lol).

Then there was Tevin Campbell. Hahaha! I remember the year I got a walkman for my birthday. I think it was my twelfth birthday. I saved my pocket money to buy a tape. Went to the record shop and had a listen to a few tracks on Tevin's album and decided that was it! I bought it and immediately started fantasising of the day he and I would meet. The day we would pass each other in the street and he would be struck by my beauty and fall madly in love with me (I was already madly in love with him). Then he'd sweep me off my feet and we'd get married and live happily ever after. By the way all this happened while I was still twelve! LOL! Oh blessed youth, where did you go???

Who else was there? Oh yeah, I remember all the could have beens that I now wonder whatever happened to them. There was this sweet guy I met while I was working in retail. Unfortunately I was in a relationship so couldn't return his interest. He was such a gentleman. His name was Aqua. He was Ghanaian. He used to walk me to the bus stop after our late shift and wait with me for my bus, then cross over to get his own bus in the opposite direction. Oh Mehn!!!

There's been a few good ones. But I gave my time and my best (at that time) to the bad ones. I didn't realise How sweet Aqua was until much, much, much later. So it's that same old saying "we only seem to like the bad boys". Lol. I didn't realise how much Yomi really liked me until much, much later too. I broke things off with Yomi because I felt we were getting too serious. We'd started to hold hands when we were out of our parents' sights. The thought of my parents catching us terrified me more than the excitement I felt when he smiled at me. I wrote him a letter and sent my brother to give it to him. I watched him from afar as he took the letter. He had a huge smile on his face (I guess he thought it was a love letter) then the smile dropped and he looked up at me an ripped up the letter. tears were rolling down my face when I heard my mum's voice break into the atmosphere with *"Bukola!!! Kilode t' on sukun???" (*Bukola, why are you crying?) I jumped! Hahahaha! I said "Oh mummy, I have a headache." She took me to the front of the church for prayer! Hahahahahahahaha!

Right now I'm seriously crushing on Idris Elba! He's the only guy I see! Lolol. My sister is concerned because I think she thinks it's unhealthy for a woman of my age. I should be putting myself out there so the correct one can at least see me. Well, I'm not ready. Abeg just leave me with my fantasies for now jare."

Hope you found it as amusing as I did tonight. Lol!

Until next time!

Mwah!

Buki.

Tuna and Avocado

Good afternoon folks!

 

Hope you're enjoying your weekend.

 

For those who asked, I managed to find out the name of the nail varnish in my previous post. It's call Eternal Optimist by Essie. ;)

 

I made an accidental discovery and thought I would share it. What had happened was...

 

Usually on Saturday's when my son is at home, I make a full English breakfast. He really looks forward to it. Bless. Last Saturday however, I just didn't fancy cooking anything. Plus we both had places to get to. So I whipped out leftover tuna mix from the fridge. Added avocado and toast to the mix and, hey presto! Breakfast was served.

 

 

Lami enjoyed the cold tuna in his toasted sandwich, whilst I had mine on top of my toast.

 

Ingredients:

 

1 Onion

Mushrooms (optional)

1/2 a bell pepper (I used the orange one, but you can also use the red or yellow one)

Tuna (2 tins)

Tomato and Basil sauce

1 tablespoon of Olive Oil

Season with salt, garlic pepper, 1 maggi cube

Avocado

Bread (toasted)

 

Chop the onions, mushrooms and bell pepper. Heat up one tablespoon of olive oil in a pan. Add the chopped vegetables and tuna to pan. Add all seasonings. Add the tomato and basil sauce (I used Loyd Grossman's Tomato and Basil sauce). Mix everything well in. Allow to cook together for ten minutes.

 

 

 

When I originally cooked this mix we had it with pasta. I put the leftover mix in the fridge. To add to the leftover mix I simply did the following:

 

Chop the avocado into big(ish) chunks. Sprinkle a little salt and pepper on top of the avocado.

 

Toast the bread. Spread the spread of your choice - I use olive spread.

 

Serve leftover tuna mix with toast and avocado slices/chunks.

 

Et voila!

 

 

Yummm!

 

Hope you give this a go. If you do, let me know how it turned out.

 

Have a great weekend! Hope it's sunny where you are!

 

Buki

xox

 

(Disclaimer: All pictures used were taken by, edited by and belong to bukibelle.com)



A New Direction

Hello Folks,

How goes things with you all? I hope it's all good!

Just thought I'd breeze through and put up a quick post. I'm thinking of doing more things like outfit posts, hair and beauty products, food, and even decor/house and home products and improvements. I will still post my thoughts and such as and when I feel the need to, but would like to include more variety. I hope you enjoy the new direction I've decided to take, and that you'll continue the journey with me.

That said, I attended a ladies networking event on Saturday in support of a friend who is a makeup artist. There was a lot to see (and buy) in a small space. The event could have done with a much bigger venue to be honest. It was packed full of very creative women who make their own products. From natural hair products, soya wax candles, to African print soft furnishings. I took a lot of leaflets and business cards, and will hopefully explore each exhibitor at some point. This is what I wore.

I got my nails done while I was there too! Unfortunately I forgot to take a note of the name of this colour, but it's by a brand called Essie. This colour is called Eternal Optimist by Essie. Although Essie has great colours, I find they don't last without a good top coat. My favourite top coat has to be by Barry M. Barry M varnishes last five days easily!

What did you get up this weekend? Whatever it was, hope you enjoyed yourselves!

Until the next post, stay blessed. Have a great week ahead.

Buki.

xox

(Disclaimer: All pictures used were taken by, edited by and belong to bukibelle.com)

Don't Worry

Hi Folks!!

I hope you're all doing great. My UK people, hope you've been enjoying the lovely weather! We all know how temperamental it is over here, so we've got grab it when we can!

I know I'm a very inconsistent blogger. There are many reasons for this. One of them is I have periods of feeling down and I don't want to bring all that negativity here too often. A colleague who has recently discovered my blog was commenting on what she'd seen so far. We had a little chat about my inconsistency. She encouraged me to just be free. She sited a few blogs she follows where she's seen bloggers blog their ebbs and flows of life. I won't always feel negative and things will eventually work out. So, with that said, here's my current state of mind. 

Sometimes I worry. I worry that this is all there is to my life. I worry that my boy will grow up, leave home and I'll be an old spinster (really, real thoughts). All alone with no companion apart from my son's wife and kids (and extended family of course - see how crazy these thoughts are? I'm alone, but not alone - but you get my drift right? I hope you do. Lol).

Sometimes I worry that I am actually not that bright. Things happen and I do silly things and think "woah! That was dumb!". Hey, don't mock me, I'm just being real.

Sometimes I worry that I'm stuck and this is my lot. No more, no less. Just this. Obviously these kinds of thoughts can bring a person down.

I stray away from God every now and then for one reason or other. But a re-occurring reason is because I just don't think I'm worth the bother. I failed Him so many times (and in the same areas, over and over again). So I tell myself there are others more worthy of His time. (These are real thoughts!!! Mind your thoughts people!!!) Of course that is a LIE!

Well, tonight in the midst of my worry I turned to Him. Decided not to wait for Sunday to hear from Him. Decided not to wait until Pastor preaches the right word into my situation. I looked to Him (from whence cometh my help. right?). I picked up my smart phone, opened up my Bible App and typed in "worry" in the search bar. Fifty-four scriptures popped up. I'm guessing He knew we'd be doing a heck of a lot of worrying.

Well, my scripture of choice, or rather the one that caught my attention was/is:

Luke 12:24-28

(24) Look at the ravens. They don't plant or harvest or store food in barns, for God feeds them. And you are far more valuable to him than any birds! (25) Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? (26) And if worry can't accomplish a little thing like that, what's the use of worrying over bigger things? (27) Look at the lilies and how they grow. They don't work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. (28) And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?

So with that said, if you're like me, stop worrying. Leave it in God's care and get on with living in the now. Enjoy your life and stop worrying. (This is also a note to self!).

So there, I just shared another ebb. The next post has to be a flow ;)

Enjoy the rest of your week!

Buki xox

What's Popping?

Hello Beautiful People!

How goes things? Great I hope. Here's a quickish post. This is what I've been up to of late.

Domestic Bliss

I've been enjoying a bit too much of late. I've been privileged enough be able to get home early from work over the past few weeks. What this has meant is that I've been cooking up a storm most days. My son and I have been enjoying all kinds of delicacies throughout the week. Almost every day has been like Christmas. As I type (the time right now is 18:49) I'm frying plantain to have with the jollof rice, roast chicken and stew that I've just finished cooking. Too much enjoyment! Lol. Now I'm soon to resume to my normal working routine, I shudder to think. Brrrrr. Man, I think I'd make a great housewife.

I forgot to take a picture before I started carving into the chicken. Lol.

Served! Jollof rice, roast chicken and plantain.

Lami's been enjoying having me at home early. And I've enjoyed being home early too. I think I need to rethink my hours - either get to work earlier so I can leave earlier or reduce them (reducing is highly unlikely though). I've been on top of all my housework -all the laundry gets done! By Sunday night, there's nothing in the laundry baskets. To me, this is bliss! Nothing worse than wanting to wear something and it's in the wash. I'm sure many can relate.

What's on Telly? 

I love a good costume drama I do. And recently I've been enjoying Mr Selfridge on ITV1. Based on the story of the owner of the self-named store Selfridges, I'm totally caught up on the story lines. Every week is better than the last. We're currently on the second series (season 2 for my American readers), and I am praying they will have a third series. Please God. The show is just too good. Here's the trailer for the currently airing series for you to enjoy.

The drama...

I have also been enjoying The Great British Sewing Bee on BBC2. This show is so much fun. And it's really inspiring for the budding seamstress. I have a bag load of ideas - things I want to make from scratch, modify, and even completely redesign. The wheels in my head are churning away.

Ooooo! The intensity!

Almost forgot to mention the amazing Chinelo Bally. This young lady is one of the least experienced of the group of contestants. Despite this, she's impressed the judges every week. She has blown me away, every week! She's naturally gifted with sewing. And her pleasant nature doesn't hurt at all either. I'm rooting for her. Go Chinelo!

Song of The Moment!

I soooo love this song by Pharrell Williams. It makes me "Happy". My official song for summer 2014. My son and I get jiggy whenever it's playing. In fact the time right now is 21:26 and I'm playing it in the background. Guess what little man is doing? Clapping and dancing along next to me. (Ummm, he's supposed to be in bed though?!?!) Lol. We love it. Thanks Pharrell!

Because I'm happeee-eee-eee-eee!

So that's what I've been up to of late. 

Enjoy the rest of your week.

I'll be back! Lol.

Buki. xox

About Last Year

Hello People!

How goes it? I'm hoping everything is a-okay!

I've had a busy and demanding couple of weeks. I've recently changed departments and undertaken a completely different job role. It's been a lot to take in, but it's somewhat enjoyable. 

I wanted to come by and kind of fill in the gap. I've been up to a lot whilst I was away, and I just wanted to share some of that.

Dating Palava!

Last year I decided to take a dip into the dating world. I went on a few dates, some good, some not so good. The thing dating showed me is what I want and what I do NOT want. I gave online dating a go. After dating several different guys I decided I wanted to meet my Mr Right in a more organic way. So screw online dating! Lol. Well, for now anyway. I've also learned to never say never. Because boy! If it comes to it, I will try again. ;)

A friend of mine tried to set me up three times last year too. Oh boy! I find myself frustrated around British guys, or guys with a British mentality. Or is it just me. This fear of rejection thing is an absolute curse. You have to practically run a man down for him to make a move, and I won't do that. So I guess we'll both just stand here staring blankly waiting for the other to make a move. Seriously?! That's how it felt. Loool! Where is the chase in men these days? where's the hunter mentality? I tire.

And then there's the great date! You go on a blind date, have an amazing evening. I mean, the atmosphere is lovely, food is good, conversation is great, and company is amazing (ahh so you think). And then he doesn't call. Like what the what?! Lol. ok, NEXT!!!

Seriously, there's so much more I want to share, but not blogging anonymously has it's limitations. All in all, it was an eye-opener.

Li'l Man

My son started secondary school in September. I have to say that was huge for me. Thankfully we got our first choice. And I'm very pleased with the transition. The school was very helpful with the transition from primary to secondary school. He's been getting on great. He's doing really good. I couldn't be more proud. 

Big Boy! He doesn't really wear glasses. Na just for posing. Omo mummy.

He's matured so much in one year. They really do grow up fast. You have to cherish every single moment I tell you. Now he's refusing to cut his hair. He's growing his afro (oh Lord). I like his hair cut low, looking smart. But no, apparently afro's are in. Thankfully he's agreed to shape-ups. Well, I've insisted - no shape up, no afro!! Who's the mummy here?? Lol.

My shnookums and I. Mwa!

Kids make me laugh. I remember when he couldn't wait to wash the dishes and hoover the floor. Now he's graduated to higher levels of housework, he runs and hides! Haha, se bi you wanted to help na? Loooool. He's even dabbled in a little cooking. he helped cook this whole chicken. I must say, I don't know if it's because I didn't cook it myself, but it was really delish!

Lami's first real cooking project (with a little help from mama of course).

Aso Ebi Drama!

A friend of mine got married in October. I gave my aso ebi to my mum to have it sewed in Naija since she was going. Somehow I got the dates mixed up, and my mum was due back the day after the said wedding. Come and see drama to get my cloth o. My mum arranged to send it through a family friend that was coming through Heathrow. I'd arranged to meet him at the airport. This family friend gave both of us his wrong contact number. I waited in the airport for four hours (the flight was also delayed). I spent hours searching every face that passed to see if they were looking for someone. I forgot to mention, we had never met before. He told me tell to write my mum's name on a board to help identify me easily. I did as he said and stood in a very prominent place, and I called his phone endlessly.

After four hours of waiting, searching faces, unanswered telephone calls - no joy, I left the airport without what I came for. I went home, too tired and hungry to be angry even. The next morning I got a text from this family friend apologising that he'd given me the wrong number. By that time, my annoyance had subsided. We arranged to meet that evening since the wedding was the following day. I finally got my aso ebi and I was knackered. The main reason for sending the aso ebi to Naija to be sewed was to save money. The money I saved there I ended up spending on travel to Heathrow airport and petrol money to (I can't even remember where, but it was faaaar) his house to go and collect my cloth. Mstcheewwww! And to top it off, I had no time to make any alterations to the dress myself. I just had to rock it as it was.

The famous Aso Ebi. Even my pose was like "I don tire o!". Lol.

And In Other News...

Not much else to report, I went to a ball in October - had an amazing meal. My lovely friend sponsored me to go because I was dragging my feet and was a little bit strapped for cash. Thank you Judith! xoxox. Celebrated my birthday in November. Went to another wedding in December - I made the skirt myself this time. Lol. I bought a sewing machine in 2012, started out with making alterations. I made some chair cushion covers, and have now graduated - I made a skirt from scratch. Whoop whoop! 

What I wore to the ball in October

The dinner at the ball - it was amazing, but I'm still not 100% sure it wasn't down to being so hungry before the meal. I was saving myself all day for it. Haha!

One of my besties and I at the ball. Love this chick mehn - Shout out Grace you beautiful soul! x

My birthday dinner ensamble in November

The wedding in December - I made that skirt myself! Yay me! Lol.

Well, I think that pretty much brings us up to 2014.

That was a snapshot of my 2013. Hope you enjoyed the read and the pictures. To God be the glory (always wanted to say that. Lol).

Random selfies with my boy.

Blog you again soon!

Buki. xoxox

(Disclaimer: All pictures used were taken by, edited by and belong to bukibelle.com)

It's Been Too Long

Well a huge hello and Happy New Year to you all!

I hope you're all doing well. I hope you've had great Christmas and New Year's celebrations. And I hope the year ahead is full of wonderment (wonderful enjoyment) for you.

I've been away a looong time. I realise my last post was in May, and I only posted a total of three times in 2013. Whilst this is appalling, I can't say it was completely accidental (it wasn't completely on purpose either). I had desired to blog a whole lot more than I did, but it just wasn't happening. I also went through a lot in terms of changing my heart and mindset in a lot of areas.

The first half of last year I spent feeling "less than" in so many ways. Once I realised my mindset was generally negative, I had to take a step back from blogging.

Sometimes when you take a big hit it takes a while for the pain to kick in, and when it finally does, it feels like hell (whatever hell must feel like). When I first got separated I think anger was all I felt. I went through 2012 completely disoriented. Eventually the actual pain kicked in. I couldn't handle the magnitude of what had happened to me and how on earth I let it. Then after the pain, more anger. I was angry with absolutely everybody involved. I was especially angry with God. He gets blamed for everything, even though he sends warnings, blockades, great big huge billboard signs! All of them ignored of course. Then He gets the blame. Smh.

Anyway, I'm happy to say bye bye to 2013, and happy to get on with life. 2013 wasn't bad. I'd say it was a year of growth. 2013 taught me a lot of very valuable lessons. One of the most important ones was self-acceptance. Loving me no matter what's going on, what others may have to say, how others act towards me, and (wait for it...) no matter what I've done. Such a liberating feeling. I'm also free from the bondage of "what will they think?". My new perspective is "what will God think?"

Yes, 2013 has been a pivotal year for me to say the least. I'm grateful for the lessons.

Well guess what?! I'm back! I'm rebooted, refreshed, and rejuvenated! Whoop! Positive about life and the year ahead. I truly sense that 2014 is going to be special. I don't normally feel so positive about the year ahead, but I'm not ashamed to say, this year I am. Very positive!

I've made some changes regarding this blog. The first is the name. Previously www.msbukiwrites.blogspot.com, now I welcome you to www.bukibelle.com. I wanted to change my blog name a while now. I think "msbukiwrites" gives the impression that I'm a writer, but I'm not. It took me forever to decide on a new name. I finally decided on BukiBelle. I started to feel uncertain again, then I got a fragrance called Belle (by Lancome) for my birthday. Smells delightful! Alas! Confirmation! Thus bukibelle.com was born.

This year I hope to be a lot more active in the blogosphere than I was last year.

Thank you for taking the journey with me so far. I hope you'll continue to stick around!

Buki. xox