Have you ever watched a dancer dance? I mean really dance an emotional piece? Until it brought you to the point of tears? I know, it's really something isn't it? I was watching Dance Scene with Laurieann Gibson. There's a young aspiring dancer who is new to the team. Laurieann keeps going on and on about her not expressing enough soul or emotion in her dancing. To the point that even I was getting irritated by Laurieann. Then one day something snapped inside this young dancer. She let loose. When she performed in front of an audience she completely stole the show. It was like she was the only one on the stage. She brought me to tears.
Then I got to thinking about my own gifts. Just a few days ago I was whining and complaining that I have no "real" gifts. I couldn't see anything about myself that really makes me stand apart from the next person. Nothing special. Know what I mean? Ever get that feeling?
Well, after watching this young lady dance her heart out it brought me back to life (back to reality - Soul II Soul - whoop whoop! Lol). We all have a gift that sets us apart from the next person. The only difference between perhaps me and that young lady is she's actually walking in hers. I mean really walking in hers.
What I love to do more than anything else is sing. I've always done. Problem is I lack the confidence to really let it rip in front of other people. When I'm at home I sing my heart out like you wouldn't believe. My son has come running to me a few times, asking "mum, was that you?". Lol. So there has to be something there right? So what's holding me back?
I remember I've had a few knock backs. A friend once said "you need to take singing lessons". In my sensitivity, I took offence. But realistically, the best of the best always sharpen their craft. Another said, "Shhhh, I'm trying to listen to 'so and so' sing, her voice is amazing!". Those two comments stick out in my thoughts like thorns. I have let these two comments hold me back for long enough. Not everyone is going to like my voice. Not everyone will appreciate your gift. But, so what?! They're not your creator. God's placed gifts inside all of us that He wishes to enjoy. He wants to see us shine. He wants to enjoy the show too na. Lol. So why do we let others hinder us? What others say and what they think?
A lot of the time the people who are so quick to criticise wouldn't dare let their own gifts shine for fear of being criticised too. So why allow them to put you in bondage?
I'm actually in my Church's Praise and Worship team. Everytime a team leader wants to push me to the front I recoil. I was leading Praise and Worship during midweek services for a while, and I was starting to build some confidence. Then one day I hit one wrong note and my voice cracked a bit, then I was like "uhn uhn, I ain't doing this no more! I have an anointing to be a backing singer.". Hahaha! That was fear talking. Got to stop fear stopping me from excelling.
How about you? Have you had a similar exprience? If so, how have you overcome your fears? Or what are you doing about it?
Let's not hide our lights under a bushel. Mark 4:21 Is a lamp brought to be put under a basket or under a bed? Is it not to be set on a lampstand? Matthew 5:15 -16...and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.
So, I am going to give my gifts my all. My singing, my cooking, my parenting, my home-making, my career. I'm going to give them all my all. For the gifts and the calling of God are irrevocable. Romans 11:29. That means once God gives, He NEVER takes back. So why not appreciate Him and the gifts he's given us by using them and using them well to glorify Him? I think that's fair.
Please note this post is a note to self. But please be encouraged too.
In life things can get really rough. Life can take unexpected turns. You can get so frustrated because you NEVER seem to arrive. Sometimes it feels like every time you take one step forward, you take another ten steps backwards. You can look at your life and say to yourself "how did I get here???" Or, "where to now???" (Questions I've been asking myself a lot lately!). Jesus said in John 16:33 - In the world ye shall have tribulations: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.
So a) the battle isn't ours , He said He has overcome the world. And b) the battle has already been won, He said He has overcome the world. So we've got to remember to be thankful for every new day. The mere fact that we're here to experience anything, good or bad, is reason enough to give thanks. Because we still have a fighting chance. Because we live to fight another day. Or better still, just remember He's already done all the fighting for us. So we just need to give Him thanks.
Sometimes I want to quit! Sometimes I just want to run and hide, then I have to remind myself of all that I have to be thankful for. I have to remember how far I've come in life. Yes, I've not arrived - but to be honest no one ever really does. And yes, there's always room for improvement and I can do better. But, things aren't as bad as the devil would have me believe. You know why? I'm still here. Still alive, still got breath in me. So I've got to, I've just got to keep going. I haven't come this far just to quit here and now. Success could be just around the next corner.
